Title/Description   Author

How About a Coke and Some Fries? by Wayne Kyle Spitzer

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I had a dream. In the dream I was running, I and a thousand others, through the Nevada desert. It’s open range out there: no fences impeded us, but the cows scattering before us slowed our passage, tripping us up. They mooed in terror even as we cried out, but they weren’t afraid of us so much as the Shadow behind us all.

That shadow was an army, led by Ronald McDonald. He was grinning, leering even, blood-red lips frozen in a rictus. At his side was Jack, fell head bouncing. Little Wendy squeezed between them, screaming like a Valkyrie, braided red locks flying. They were a Calvary; they were riding Rainbeer. Their hooves churned up the dust through which burst a million antenna balls, cackling, bouncing, leaping …

Behind them marched a sea of corporate shock troops, wave after wave, briefcases in hand. Trumpets sounded, like something from The Lord of the Rings, heralding the return of the Burger King—

Ahead of us the cows starting vanishing, dropping from the face of the world. “It’s a stampede!” someone cried, terrified. There were screams that fell away sharply.

We had come to a sheer drop-off—a few of us having realized too late. There was nowhere left to run. Above us, like vultures, attack helicopters circled. Turning to meet my doom, I saw that Ronald McDonald had become former President Ronald Reagan.

“Well,” he said. “How about it?”

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About The Author...

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Wayne Kyle Spitzer

    

Wayne Kyle Spitzer (born July 15, 1966) is an American author and low-budget horror filmmaker from Spokane, Washington. He is the writer/director of the short horror film, Shadows in the Garden, as well as the author of Flashback, an SF/horror novel published in 1993. Spitzer's non-genre writing has appeared in subTerrain Magazine: Strong Words for a Polite Nation and Columbia: The Magazine of Northwest History.

Other Books By Wayne Kyle Spitzer

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Napoleon

SciFi
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Comes a Ferryman

Fantasy
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Black Hole, White Fountain

Unspecified
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The Tempter and the Taker

Romance
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The Pierced Veil

Romance
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To the End of Ursathrax

Unspecified
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X-Ray Rider 1

Autobiography
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X-Ray Rider 2

Autobiography
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X-Ray Rider 3

Autobiography
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Algernon Blackwood's The Willows

Paranormal
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Flashback

Horror
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Faraway, Nearby

Paranormal

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That Thing We Killed

Young Adult

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Coffin Road

Fantasy

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Lean Season

Horror
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Killer in the Looking Glass

SciFi
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Behind a Pale Mask

Fantasy
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Red Marillion

Horror
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Wet Bark

Horror

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Flying the Fog Roads of Cascadia

Biography
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How About a Coke and Some Fries?

Humor
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Flashback Dawn 1: "Naaygi"

SciFi



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